Yes, it's true.

I once met Britney Spears. Here's the short version of the story:

When I was 18, "Teen People" was a brand-new magazine, and they had put out a call for "trendspotters." Being an aspiring writer who also loved getting free stuff, I applied, and, despite my inability to "spot" a "trend" even if it were standing in front of me waving a sign that said, "I am a trend!" I was accepted.

There was a big kick off event at the Mall of America for all local trendspotters. It was held on a Sunday and, being a bored college student without much to do, I went. I was promised free stuff (which turned out to be a pair of mittens made from recycled plastic bottles) and a free concert from none other than Britney Spears.

"Who?" I said when I read the invitation. I'd never heard of her. "Hit Me Baby One More Time" had just started playing on the radio on the coasts, but hadn't really made it to Minnesota yet.

Now, to set the stage here, I was taking three women's studies classes at the time: Gender in American Society, Psychology of Women, and African-American Women Writers. When I got to the event and saw Ms. Spears, who was 16 at the time, dressed like a 10-year-old and dancing like a stripper, I was all kinds of offended. I should also mention that I was the oldest and least-trendy "trendspotter" in attendance, as my outfit in this photo will testify. My meek attempt to be fashionable, ladies and gentlemen.

When the concert was over, I thanked the Goddess but was suddenly pulled aside by Jorge Ramon, a guy I'd later see all the time on VH1. He was Teen People's fashion editor. He said something that amounted to, "Look, you're the oldest one here and you're not expected to wait for your mom to drive you home in five minutes, so could you please help us with this luridly-dancing neophyte's autograph signing at Sam Goody?"

I agreed, and for the next hour or so I sat, handed out cassettes, and literally rubbed elbows with Britney while she signed autographs. I've been told by two independent sources, but have never actually confirmed this myself, that there's a brief scene in her "Behind the Music" episode on VH1 where you can see me sitting next to her. If anyone can find it on the web somewhere, please post a link in the comments.

I figured I should get a picture with her in case she ever became famous, so this photo is what resulted. I chatted with her for a couple of minutes after the autograph signing and quickly determined she was the most vacuous person I'd ever met. Looking in her eyes, all I saw was the back of her skull. Spooky.

So that's the story behind the photo. Me, mildly disgusted and feeling intellectually superior, and vapid, maybe-this-is-my-ticket-out-of-Mickey-Mouse-Club-obscurity Britney. Enjoy.