Do not do the Dew

I learned a valuable lesson last weekend. I learned that my body does not respond well to energy drinks.

And this is coming from someone who once routinely drank Mountain Dew because I simply liked the taste. Those days are now behind me, but I thought I'd take one more trip down that path Sunday when I accepted a free canned energy drink from some company promoting them outside the Verizon Center in D.C. I have no recollection of the drink brand — probably because that knowledge was lost as my head vibrated itself to sleep that evening.

I actually felt no ill effects after drinking the concoction at 3 p.m. Sunday. But when it came time for bed, I tossed and turned for an hour before I abandoned the notion at 11 p.m. I plopped down before the computer and proceeded to cruise the information highway. For three hours. I forced myself back to bed at 2 a.m. and tossed and turned some more before finally falling asleep somewhere around 3 a.m.

To say the drink made me twitchy is like saying Congress has time management issues. You're grossly understating the problem.

So as my body ages, I find that I must now put intensely caffeinated drinks on the Dead to Me list. I consider that a good move, though, if it keeps me from having some Sheldon Cooper inspired breakdown.